Identity isn't simple

Identity is important: it is how we view ourselves, how we present ourselves to others and how others view us. Identity is about labels, yes, but it is deeper than that. Internally it helps us form our world view. It helps us to find connections with those that identify similarly to us, and it informs and changes when we start to find connections and similarities with labels and identities in which we originally thought were different to us. Externally we can show and share our own identity and labels with others in a way that seeks to help others understand what it is to be us. We can absorb and seek to understand the labels that other people identify with so we can understand what it is to be them.

Identity is also separate from us. It can be the labels that others put on us, and that we put on others, without consultation of the individuals concerned. It is intrinsically linked to both preconceptions and experiences. It is intrinsically linked to society and history. It is clouded by definitions and colloquialisms and language. It is clouded by assumptions, prejudices and stereotypes. It is clouded by ignorance, and refusals to acknowledge connections to broader experiences.

Identity is complex. We identify ourselves by different labels in different times, groups and places. However it is never separate. You might be able to separate the words into individual meanings, but identity is not words. Identity is meaning and emotion. It is not some succinct summation of what you are. It is intrinsically personal. By its nature identity is not easy, and it will always be made up of parts that from the outside will seem at odds with each other. Every person has a multiplicity of labels they give themselves, and they will never all be in agreement with one another.

Discussing any topic involving identity is hard. One of the easiest ways to break down a conversation about identity is to start using language and arguments that dismiss another person’s right and ability to form their own identity. Another way is to ignore the multiplicity that is identity, and with that too often impose stereotypes and prejudices. A third way is to ignore the connections (historical, ideological, social) that come with these identities, and by extension dismiss the very real connections that exist within issues of identity.

Identifying with one label does not automatically identify you with another, nor does it preclude you from identifying with a third and seemingly opposing label. I am me, but what is me? I am the product of my childhood, family, education, race, ethnicity, religion, socioeconomic standing, local community, broader community, national community, political standing, the history of my family, community, religion, people, country, race. I am also the product of the labels that have been imposed on me by others: by family, teachers, politicians, statisticians, doctors, friends, historians. The list is endless, and yet we still have this yearning to reduce it to something short, smart and snappy. Identity is not buzzwords: it isn't succinct, simple or definitive.

You may not identify as something that is part of your personal, familial or societal history. This is normal. However it can be extremely helpful to know where you came from, what you are a product of. It can help you understand where your beliefs and ideologies come from and examine the connections that lie there. Philosophies, morals and world views do not appear out of nowhere, and neither do the identities that spring from them. Understanding where your identity comes from will help you understand where other peoples’ identities come from. Understanding that, whilst you may not personally apply an identity based on the past to yourself, it does influence you, and you must acknowledge that influence even if it sits uncomfortably with you.

When someone identifies themselves as something they are not giving you just a word. There is a history to that word, deeper meanings that come from both their experiences and those that came before them. It is not just a word. It is memory and emotion. It is not simple. This means that when we talk about one part of identity, for instance religion, it doesn't come separate from the history, context and current social attitudes towards it. It doesn't separate itself instantly from race, ethnicity, culture and history, and it is simplistic to expect it to. To talk about one part of a person or groups identity you must acknowledge the other parts of it. The connections that are there cannot be denied just so you can come out with an easy answer. To do that is inherently dismissive. It is dismissive of peoples’ experiences and history, and the history behind the words themselves. It sets up a problematic discourse that requires people to be one or the other, to pick a side, and it forces walls around the words we use to identify ourselves with. Identity is not a jigsaw puzzle where only a few certain pieces can be connected to each other.

Identity is not fixed. It is not tied to one moment in time. It is changeable: old connections are seen as less important while new connections are made. You can reclaim a former part of your identity that you left behind before. You can identify with something only momentarily, or it can be a lifelong part of you. It doesn't always sit comfortably, and there will always be someone else for which the way you identify yourself is uncomfortable to them, just as their identity could sit uncomfortably with you. You could share a very similar identity with someone else, but you could be troubled by it whilst the other is at peace with it. This is because identity isn't fixed into one spot by a single set of definitions and experiences.

In the end identity is messy, emotional and deeply personal. It can be easy to dismiss another’s identity because it doesn't make sense to you, as could you dismiss part of your own identity because you have been told it is incompatible with the rest. Identity isn't meant to be easy, and it is all too easy to fall into assumptions and prejudices. To impose a narrow band of definition on something that isn't easy to define, to separate something that is inherently tangled up with all the other parts that make up a person’s identity. To dismiss or belittle other’s identities is to miss out on the complexity that is humanity. It serves no one to be reductive, and it serves no one to be inflexible. Identity is multiple, and it is complex, and it is never, ever simple.